Sweet Surrendering Read online

  “No, you don’t have to do that. I can’t let you do that for me. We can make this work. This is only the first night. It’s going to take some adjusting.”

  “I don’t want to put you in this position. It isn’t right of me to make you take chances, Sunshine.” I put my hand on his mouth.

  “It’s not for you to decide. I’m the one who told you to put your dick inside me. Repeatedly. And I also told you that I would fire you if you didn’t do it. Jesus, I made you finger me in the middle of a meeting. I’m not innocent in this.”

  He circled his finger on my shoulder.

  “No, you’re definitely not innocent, but I like that about you.”

  “Oh, you like that? What else do you like?” I smiled and moved closer to him.

  “I like your bitch face. And I like that you always wear high heels. And I like that you care so much about your job. And I like this . . . And this . . .” He moved his hand from one breast to the other and then slid it down my stomach and moved and thumbed my clit and flicked my piercing.

  “Oh, I definitely like this.” I was so sensitive from the recent contact with that area that it didn’t take much for me to want him again.

  “I like your hair, and your eyes, and this,” I said, putting my finger in his chin dimple. “And I like this,” I said tapping his nipple ring. “And I guess I like this,” I said, moving down to his dick.

  “You seemed to like it a few minutes ago.”

  “I guess. It was okay.” He growled and lunged at me until he was straddling me again. I screamed and he nuzzled in my neck.

  “Speaking of that, I need to take care of it.” He reached over to grab some tissues and tossed the condom. I needed to get up and pee, so I did that and then came back and crawled back into bed with him, snuggling under his arm.

  “I like this,” he said, pulling me close.

  “I like this too.” I liked it a lot. A lot, a lot. I yawned even though I tried not to.

  “Go to sleep, Sunshine. We’ll have other nights.” I didn’t want to, but he had really nice pillows, so I let myself rest against his chest and the sound of his breathing lulled me to sleep.

  An alarm blared in my ears and it felt like it was stabbing my skull with sound.

  “Oh my GOD, that needs to stop,” I moaned and rolled over. I’d been sprawled over Lucah’s bare chest and his arms and legs had been all twisted with mine.

  The blaring stopped abruptly and I looked at him as he blinked his eyes open.

  “I wanted to make sure you had enough time to shower and get to work. Sorry about the early hour, Sunshine.”

  He kissed my forehead and I squinted at him.

  “No big. Why don’t you get up and make me breakfast, or get it, or something and I’ll just lay here for a little while and . . . get myself mentally ready.”

  “You’re not a morning person, are you? I thought you would be.”

  “Why? Because of the name? I think that was wishful thinking on my parents’ part. Besides, nobody really calls me by my full first name, not even my parents.”

  He got up and pulled his boxers back on before he leaned over me.

  “I’m going to get some breakfast ready. If you’re not in the shower in ten minutes, I’m coming in here and throwing you in.” He nipped the end of my nose and I put the pillow over my head.

  “Get up, Sunshine,” he said, ripping the covers off me.

  “Douchebag!”

  His only answer was to laugh as he banged around the kitchen. Well, if the alarm didn’t get me up, the noise in the kitchen did. I grabbed my bag and went to shower. One of these mornings I wanted to shower with him. Or nights. Just nights. Maybe tomorrow.

  I blow dried my hair and got it up before I put on my work attire. I was back to my pencil skirts and buttoned shirts and I had my red heels on. His back was to me as I walked into the kitchen, but the moment he heard my heels on the tile floor, he turned.

  “You’re trying to end me, Sunshine. There’s no way I can work today. I give up.” He held his hands up, one of them holding a spatula.

  “Don’t be so dramatic, Mr. Ginger.” I walked closer to see what he was doing. Looked like omelets in one pan and fried potatoes in another. I’d never been so spoiled with breakfast before.

  “Hey, I’m very sensitive about my hair color. Be careful there, Miss Clarke.” I grabbed a handful of his hair and tugged on it.

  “What are you making?” I made sure to keep my distance from the pans so I didn’t get grease on my white shirt.

  “Omelets and potatoes. Which reminds me, what would you like in your omelet? I have peppers, cheese and tomatoes.”

  “All of the above. One of these mornings, I’m going to make you breakfast. Sloane has taught me a thing or two in the kitchen.”

  He flipped one of the omelets.

  “Will you do it wearing nothing but those heels and an apron?”

  “We’ll see,” I said, going for the coffeepot. He’d already put out the cream and sugar for me.

  “I’m still going to have to buy you breakfast to keep up appearances,” I said as I sipped the coffee and felt instantly better. I knew it couldn’t affect me that quickly, but damn it was good stuff.

  “I don’t mind second breakfast,” he said with a little smile, almost as if he was enjoying an inside joke.

  “What’s so funny?”

  “Oh, nothing.” He scooped my omelet out of the pan and onto a plate, then added some potatoes. I went to the fridge and searched around until I found some ketchup.

  “It should be illegal to eat potatoes without ketchup,” I said, squirting some on the side of the plate.

  “What about potato chips?” he said, making up his own plate and declining my offer of ketchup.

  “I eat those with ketchup too.” My omelet was really good and filled with extra cheese.

  “I hope you like me thick, because if I keep eating breakfast like this, there’s gonna be more of me.” He shrugged.

  “I’ve never liked girls with nothing to them. There’s nothing attractive about fucking a skeleton.” I made a face.

  “Nice description.”

  “Hey, it’s true.”

  We finished breakfast and it was time for our night to be over. I took my bag and he walked me to the door.

  “See you at the-place-we-won’t-name,” I said, giving him one last kiss.

  “See you later, Miss Clarke.” I walked backwards as he closed the door slowly.

  I had to fight a deep sigh as I walked toward the elevator. I was joined by a woman with a giant box in her hands so I held the door for her.

  “Oh, thank you,” the woman said, and I recognized her voice. It was the woman who’d knocked on Lucah’s door last night. But she didn’t know who I was.

  That didn’t stop me from fidgeting and blushing the entire ride down to the lobby. The woman smiled at me as she exited and I left after her, still blushing.

  I swung by a coffee shop and got our second breakfast before I hopped in a cab and headed to the office. Somehow, Lucah (I’d have to remind myself to call him Lucas out loud at work) beat me there and I smoothed my facial expression and tried to walk normally as I approached his desk.

  “Good morning, Mr. Blaine. I thought I would bring you breakfast.” I set the bag on his desk and he gave me a cordial smile.

  “Well that was very nice of you, Miss Clarke. I was just sitting here and kicking myself that I had neglected to eat breakfast this morning.”

  “You’re welcome, Mr. Blaine,” I said and walked to my office, sat down and gave him a huge wink. He stuck his tongue out at me and I turned my computer on and started checking my messages.

  I had quite a few. It seemed that overnight one of our servers had gone down and they were still working on getting it up and running. Even in a building full of people who knew everything there was to know about computers, we still had problems. If the problem persisted, we were going to have to look at maybe getting a few more backup se
rvers, which weren’t going to be cheap. Lovely. If the fight about the pens had been bad, this was going to be even worse.

  I scarcely had time to glance at Lucah because I was so busy doing damage control the entire day. I was starving by one thirty, and I knew there was no way I was going to leave the office at this rate.

  I picked up the phone and dialed Lucah.

  “I’m so sorry, but it doesn’t look like I’m going to get to leave my desk to pee, let alone eat, so could you get me some lunch?” It was perfectly within his job description, but I felt like a bitch asking.

  “What do I get in return?” he said in a low voice.

  “Um, nothing, seeing as how this is part of your job, Mr. Blaine. Don’t make me write you up.”

  He sighed.

  “Fine. But you owe me a blow job.” I gasped and he laughed. “What can I get you, Miss Clarke?”

  I had barely left my desk by the end of the day, and it felt strange to stand after sitting for so long. I was exhausted.

  And then I saw Lucah sitting at his desk and waiting for me. That was all I needed to not feel so tired anymore. Amazing sex was better than coffee. Or maybe having amazing sex while drinking coffee.

  Probably not. Sounded dangerous. Crotch burns didn’t sound fun.

  “Oh, Miss Clarke, I just had a message for you,” he said, handing me a sticky note.

  I’m fucking you in those heels tonight.

  -Lucah

  I tried to keep my face impassive as I read it and then folded it up and put it in my purse.

  “Thank you for the message, Mr. Blaine. I will take that under consideration.”

  “Have a good night, Miss Clarke.”

  “You as well, Mr. Blaine.”

  The minute I stepped off the elevator I had a text.

  One hour.

  I shook my head and typed a response.

  One hour.

  “Oh my God, I feel like I haven’t seen you in two years!” Sloane threw herself at me.

  “Whoa, buddy. It’s only been 24 hours.” I hugged her back, which was hard because she was so tall.

  “I know, but I felt like I was missing a part of myself. How’s work?”

  “Oh, it’s . . . stressful. You?” I only had a short while to prepare for going to Lucah’s and I wanted to pick out the right underwear, but Sloane was top priority at the current moment.

  She started talking about work and telling me about how the company that did a bunch of her sewing had gone out of business, so she’d had to hurry to find someone else and do new contracts and bills of lading and so forth.

  “It’s been a complete nightmare. You have no idea. I’m running on no sleep and pure caffeine right now. Can you tell?” Just a little. Her eyes were wide and she was pale and frenzied.

  “Uh, no. Not at all. Listen, we need to talk.” I led her over to the couch and sat down. Lucah was just going to have to wait. Chicks before dicks. I sent him a quick text saying that I was going to be a little late.

  “I’m having a . . . nocturnal sexual relationship with Lucas. Lucah, actually. He wants me to call him that, for whatever reason. So that’s where I’m going tonight. And that’s where I was last night.” Sloane’s mouth dropped open and she smacked me across the shoulder.

  “No fucking way! You dirty hussy! I have a whole new view of you now. Give me some love.” She held out her hand for a fist bump and I bumped my fist with hers.

  “It’s a terrible idea. It’s probably the worst idea I’ve ever had, but for the first time in my life, being bad feels really good.” And I gave her a rundown of the previous evening, including the door sex and the s’mores and waking up next to Lucah.

  “Aw, I’m getting jealous over here. It sounds so amazing. You really like him, don’t you?” I couldn’t lie to Sloane.

  “I do. That’s the problem. I feel like I’m getting closer to him, but then there are these big holes and mysteries he’s hiding from me. I know all these intimate things about him, but then I don’t know if his parents are still alive, and he shuts me down any time I ask anything. It’s so frustrating.” I pulled my knees up and set my chin on them.

  “Aw, hun. I’m sorry. You sure you want to go see him?” Sloane rubbed my shoulder.

  “Yeah, I know it’s wrong but he makes me feel good. He makes me happy, and it’s not just because of the mind-blowing sex. Although that would be more than enough reason to go over.”

  “Good?” She raised her eyebrows up and down.

  “Very good.”

  “That’s why you’re all glowy. It’s pretty disgusting.” I got up and gave her a hug.

  “Thanks a lot. I’ve got to get ready.” She followed me to my bedroom and sat on my bed as I pulled off my work clothes and picked out a new outfit.

  “I have another piece for you, if you want to wear it.” I had been going through my underwear drawer and I was having the same problem as I did last night, not finding anything that I wanted to show him.

  “You do?”

  Sloane nodded like a bobble head on crack and then dashed to her room and came back with a gold bra and panties with black designs that almost reminded me of Victorian wallpaper. Both pieces were absolutely beautiful.

  “Put it on.” Sloane was bouncing up and down and I wished I could turn her down a few notches, so I put my hands on her shoulders and forced her to turn around so I could get dressed without her critical eye adjusting me before I even had my boobs in the bra.

  I got everything in and where it was supposed to be and told her to turn around. She gave me the once over and poked and prodded and got everything the way she wanted it and then clapped her hands.

  “Good girl. I think this one’s a winner. Now we’ll just have to see what the boy thinks.”

  “You sure you’re okay with me leaving?”

  “Um, if I was leaving you to go have fabulous sex with a hot guy, would you stop me?”

  “You wouldn’t let me stop you,” I said as I pulled a tank top over my head and then a cropped short sleeve cover over it.

  “Exactly.” Sloane handed me my jeans and I pulled them on, then jumped a few times to get my ass into them and make sure they were going to zip. It was almost period time for me, so I was a little fat this week.

  “So go get it on. Work that booty.” She did a little booty shake with her nonexistent butt and I had no choice but to join her and we had an impromptu booty shaking dance party.

  “Okay, I gotta go.” I shoved some fresh clothes in my bag and Sloane gave me a kiss on the cheek.

  “Be dirty.” Oh, she had no idea.

  “I told Sloane about us,” I said a few hours later as I rolled off Lucah. We were on the floor in the living room, not having made it to the bed. Per his request, I had the red heels on, even though they hadn’t gone with the gold and black set, but he didn’t seem to notice.

  We both caught our breath and I moved onto my side and faced him, propping my head on my elbow.

  “And?” He did the same, mirroring my position. “I thought we were keeping this on the down low.”

  “Yeah, well, I can’t spend every night here and lie about where I am. It’s just not feasible for me to do that. She’s on your team, by the way, as long as I give her plenty of details. I really need to find her a man. You know anyone?”

  “None that Sloane would want.” He got up and I stretched on the floor. I felt like he’d been giving me a better workout than the gym ever had. More fun, too.

  “Do you have any guy friends?” He’d never talked about anyone.

  “Yeah, a few.” He sat down next to me wearing boxers.

  “Why haven’t I ever heard of them?”

  He shrugged one shoulder.

  “I don’t know. I just don’t talk about them with you, that’s all.” I reached for my bra and put it on.

  “Why are you always so closed, Lucah? I’m not asking for your entire history. I’m asking you to share some things about your life. Just basic information a friend w
ould know. Aren’t we friends?” I came over and put my chin on his legs.

  “Friends who work together and fuck together,” he said, holding my face.

  “Strike four.”

  “Didn’t I already take care of at least one of those strikes?”

  “One. Just one.” I held one finger up, and he stuck it in his mouth and sucked on my finger. “But now you’re trying to distract me.”

  He gave me my finger back and sighed.

  “I’m sorry, Sunshine. There are just some doors that I need to keep closed. Understand?” I shook my head.

  “God, you’re stubborn.”

  “I’m also a bitch. How do you think I got where I am at Clarke Enterprises? My pretty face?” I puckered my lips at him. “I’m not asking for the world. Just a little more information. Just a bit.”

  Putting his head back he looked at the ceiling like he was praying for me to drop it.

  “What do you want to know?”

  “I’m an only child. I wanna know about your siblings. Obviously since you have nieces, you have at least one brother or sister, and you mentioned playing with brothers, so you have at least two. Come on, tell me, tell me.” As great and fabulous as the sex was, I also liked just talking with Lucah.

  “I have two brothers. One older, one younger.”

  “Aha!” I couldn’t stop myself from saying.

  “Whoa, what was that for?”

  “You have middle child syndrome. See? This explains so much now. Keep going, this is fascinating.”

  “You’re ridiculous.”

  But he didn’t stop talking. He told me about his brothers, Tate and Ryder, and that they were close when they were growing up. Tate had a wife, April, and the two little girls, Gracie and Fiona. He saw them nearly every weekend since they lived not that far away in Cambridge. He didn’t elaborate much on Ryder and I could sense there was brotherly tension, so I let that go. I was afraid to say anything or interrupt him, because this was the first time he’d voluntarily talked about himself.

  Well, the first time he’d talked about himself under duress.

  Then he talked a little bit about school, and then he asked me about school and I found myself telling stupid stories that I’d never told anyone else. Maybe it was the nudity. I hadn’t gotten to put my panties on, just my bra.