Marriage of Unconvenience Read online

  Table of Contents

  One

  Two

  Three

  Four

  Five

  Six

  Seven

  Eight

  Nine

  Ten

  Eleven

  Eleven

  Twelve

  Thirteen

  Thirteen

  Fourteen

  Fifteen

  Sixteen

  Seventeen

  Eighteen

  Nineteen

  Twenty

  Twenty-one

  Twenty-two

  Twenty-three

  Epilogue

  Author bio:

  Marriage of Unconvenience is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places and incidents are either the product of the author’s imagination or are use fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, events, business establishments or locales is entirely coincidental. | No part of this book may be reproduced, scanned or distributed in any printed or electronic form without permission. All rights reserved. | Copyright © 2018 Chelsea M. Cameron | Editing by Laura Helseth | Cover by Alessandra Morgan and Chelsea M. Cameron

  One

  “So, I’ve either got to find a new job or I’ve gotta find someone to marry me, ASAP,” I said, sipping my Coke with lime. I wasn’t much of a drinker, and since drinking out was hella expensive, I was soda-only and cheap beers at home on my couch.

  As a result of a wacky grandmother, I had thousands of dollars in the bank with my name on them. One catch? I had to be married to collect. I’d lost my job last week, so I was flipping out about how I was going to support myself.

  “I’d marry you,” my best friend, Ansel, said as he grabbed a hot wing. “I mean, I don’t have much to offer, and we’d definitely have to get an annulment, but I’d take a bullet for you, babe.” I snorted into my soda.

  “I don’t think we could even be fake married.” I loved him to the edge of the earth, but I swear, if we tried to even pretend to be a couple, we’d kill each other. Plus, there was the fact that he was gay and I wasn’t into men.

  “Yeah, probably a wise choice. I’m a pain in the ass,” he said, sucking the sauce off his fingers.

  “Must you do that?” I asked, handing him a napkin.

  “You love me,” he said, wiping off his sauce-covered face and hands.

  “I do indeed,” I said, sighing. “But seriously, what am I going to do?”

  “I can see if we have any openings. Not sure if you’re up for it, though.”

  “I’ll think about it,” I said to Ansel. He worked at a hospital, and I wasn’t sure if I could handle that. I didn’t know if I could deal with crying sick people and fighting with insurance companies.

  “Seriously, do. Not every position is patient-focused. You could be happy as hell on a computer with your headphones on.” That would be ideal. I wasn’t super great at peopleing. Only a few of my jobs had been in customer service and I had quickly realized it was not in my wheelhouse, which cut out a lot of potential jobs.

  “Or I could help you find someone to marry. I’m not sure how well I would do as a matchmaker, but I’d give it a shot.” He was sweet, but I didn’t need a matchmaker. The inheritance was a long shot. Most of the time I didn’t even think about it.

  “What possessed your grandmother to make that rule?” he asked me.

  “I was three when she died, but I’ve heard stories. I guess she didn’t like the fact that my parents weren’t married when they had me. How dare!” I gasped and pretended to be scandalized.

  “She sounds like a sassy lady.” I laughed.

  “Oh, she was. I’ve heard tons of stories. One time, a guy tried to grope her and she beat him with her umbrella until he ended up in the hospital. She could also make a killer cheesecake.”

  Ansel nodded.

  “Both important.”

  “Agreed.”

  Coming out tonight with Ansel had been a good decision. My first inclination had been to stay home and wallow in my room with a lot of cake and potato chips. I hadn’t ruled that out yet. I could do a lot in one night.

  We finished our wings and sodas and he put his arm around me.

  “You’ll land on your feet, I promise. And if you need a few bucks to get you through, I’m here. I’m always here. I don’t have much, but I’m here for you.” I hugged him back and tried to hold back tears.

  “You’re a good friend, Ansel,” I said, my voice a little shaky.

  “So are you. You’ve been there for me, Lo, when a lot of people weren’t.” His eyes were misty too. He’d started transitioning two years ago, and some of the people we’d been friends with hadn’t taken it well. I’d been struggling with figuring out my sexuality, so the two of us had sort of stuck together and had gone out on our own to find a new group who would appreciate us for how awesome we were, and we had.

  I kissed him on the cheek and he mussed my hair.

  “You’re gonna be fine, Lo. Or, you might have to reactivate your online dating profile and make a few changes.” I cringed. I’d attempted online dating when I’d first come out, hadn’t had any success, and had found a lot of creeps and people who just weren’t right for me. I didn’t have much hope now.

  “Keep your fingers crossed I find a job instead.”

  He held up his hands and crossed all his fingers except for his thumbs and then crossed his eyes at me.

  “You got it.”

  I hadn’t told my mom about losing my job yet, and the lying was killing me. We were pretty close, and I told her just about anything. But I couldn’t tell her about this, because then she would try to give me money that she and Dad didn’t have. Of course, he’d gotten money when Gram died, but all of it was gone now. Gone into the several-hundred-year-old farmhouse they lived in, and to medical bills when my mom had had her gallbladder out.

  To add insult to injury, my car needed a bunch of repairs and wasn’t drivable, and my rent wasn’t exactly cheap. Living in Boston cost major bucks, but I wouldn’t want to live anywhere else. I’d grown up just west of Boston, and had always set the city in my mind as where I eventually wanted to be. I went to BU and graduated with a degree in business and communications. I was a Boston girl, through and through.

  I had more than a few friends that had made their way from small towns to Boston and had had to go back and live with their parents. I knew there was nothing wrong with that, but I couldn’t handle the idea of that for myself. There wasn’t a whole lot in the way of industry in my hometown. I couldn’t go back.

  My roommate, Lisa, was out when I got back. She and I weren’t exactly friends, but we got along okay for two strangers who shared an apartment. We stayed out of each other’s way, and it worked.

  I grabbed a fresh bag of chips with pink sea salt and mixed up a quick mug cake to satisfy my need for something sweet. I stripped down to my bra and undies and put on one of my comfort romantic comedies.

  “Thanks, Gram,” I said, raising a chip to the ceiling. As a result of the whole “you have to be married to get the money,” I wasn’t really keen on the whole marriage idea. My parents had eventually gotten married when I was older, but only so they could share health insurance and file a joint tax return. They’d gone to the courthouse and told me about it after. There weren’t even any pictures.

  I guess I just didn’t see the point. Why did you need to do something like that to prove your love? And don’t even get me started about the wedding industry. Total expensive bullshit that somehow everyone thought was necessary. Hard pass.

  No, I wasn’t getting married. Fake or real.

  Two

  I spent the next week chasing down job leads and eating a t
on of peanut butter sandwiches, because I was trying to save as much money as possible. I’d also put some of my furniture and books up for sale online. Any little bit of cash was welcome.

  Friday afternoon I got a text from Cara and, reading between the lines, something was up. I hoped she wasn’t going to ask me for dating advice. I knew fuck all about dating men. We hadn’t talked a lot lately since she’d been busy applying to grad school, and I missed her. I’d known Cara practically my whole life. Our desks had been put together in kindergarten and that had been it. We’d had a hiatus for a while when she’d moved across the country during high school, but she’d come back to Boston for college and we’d been just as close ever since.

  Wanna get brunch tomorrow? I asked her.

  Yes, please. Our usual place?

  You got it.

  I already knew what she was going to order. Blueberry pancakes, hash, and a glass of cranberry juice. She probably knew what I was going to order, even if I didn’t yet. There wasn’t a whole lot about Cara that I didn’t know, and that was so comforting. I didn’t want to burden her with my bullshit if she had her own, but it might come spilling out anyway. I could never keep a secret from her for long.

  I WAS A FEW MINUTES late meeting Cara, and I rushed into the diner to find her already sitting at a tiny two-person table in the back. The place was packed, but that wasn’t unusual. I smiled and squeezed through booths and tables and people to get to her.

  “Hey, how’s it going?” I asked, as she stood up to give me a hug. I closed my eyes and realized she was using a new perfume.

  “Good, how are you?” she replied, and released me. I was about to ask about the perfume, but the look on her face made me forget about it.

  “Uh, fine. Are you sure you’re okay?” We both sat down and she looked away and I thought she was going to cry.

  “Um, not really. I got into grad school,” she said with a weak smile. “But they won’t give me enough financial aide, and you know how my parents are, and so I can’t go. I’m just having a hard time accepting it, I guess.” Her chin wobbled and one tear rolled down her cheek.

  “Oh, Cara, I’m so sorry. Come here,” I got up to give her another hug just as our waitress came over to take our drink orders and tell us about the specials.

  “Can you give us a minute?” I said, but Cara waved me off and sat back down.

  “No, I’m fine.” She wiped her eyes and ran her fingers through her light brown hair.

  I couldn’t think about ordering drinks, so I just got some tea and focused back on Cara.

  “You can’t work and go to school?” She shook her head.

  “They told us not to. Plus, I’m going to need to do clinicals, and that’s going to be unpaid.” Of course. It was no wonder our generation was broke as hell.

  “Did you put in an appeal?” I was trying to think of anything I could think of to fix this.

  “Yeah, I’ve tried everything. Unless I can pull like twenty grand out of my ass, I’m screwed.” Holy shit, that was a lot of money. “And that’s just for the first year.” She laughed a little and looked up at the ceiling, as if money was going to rain down on her.

  “So there goes that dream. I don’t get to be a physician’s assistant after all. I can just go back to nursing, but...” she trailed off and wiped a few more tears. “It’s just hard. To give up on that.”

  I could practically hear her heart shattering, and mine was breaking for her. I reached out and took her hand, squeezing it.

  “We’ll figure something out, Cara. You’re not the only one who, uh, needs cash.” I definitely didn’t need that much, but I needed more than a few hundred dollars.

  “I’m so sorry, I’ve been completely self-centered, what’s going on with you?” I shouldn’t have said anything. It wasn’t a competition.

  “I just kinda lost my job. So I’m looking for another one and rent is due and I have a little bit of savings, but not enough to get me through if it takes a few months. So, I guess we’re both kinda fucked.” I raised my cup of tea and she raised her glass of cranberry juice.

  “Here’s to being broke,” she said, and a little bit of the mood lightened. It was a huge relief to see her smile, and for it to be genuine.

  “You can always get a job at the hospital with me and Ansel.” I added some more honey to my tea.

  “Yeah, he already suggested that, but you know how I am with people. I swear, someone would come in with an injury and I’d either cry or throw up. I can’t do blood.” I shuddered at the thought.

  “I know. One of us just needs to win the lottery. If I won, I’d give you what you needed.” I knew she would. And so would I.

  “If only my grandmother hadn’t put that freaking clause on my inheritance. That would be more than enough to cover school for you and get me through a while without a job. I could make it stretch for years if I needed to. Ha, maybe we should get married.” The second the words were out of my mouth, everything made sense.

  “Cara, we can get married.” Her brown eyes went as wide as I’d ever seen them go and her eyebrows almost disappeared into her hairline.

  “We can what?!” She said it so loud that a few people turned and stared. I waited for them to go back to their French toast and hash browns.

  “No, seriously, there’s no stipulation on whether we have to be in love or anything. Just have a marriage certificate. We could get it annulled right afterwards. It would be so easy. I don’t know why I didn’t think of this before, it’s brilliant.” I reached out and grabbed her hand as our waitress came back to take our orders. I didn’t want to be a bitch, but Cara and I had more important things to discuss right now.

  I ordered pancakes and hash browns and ignored the waitress as she took our menus.

  “Cara, this could work.” Why wasn’t she jumping up and down?

  “No, Lo. I can’t take that money from you. It’s too much. And I wouldn’t feel right about it. I know you don’t care about marriage, but I do, and I wouldn’t want to do it for the wrong reasons, and money isn’t a good enough reason.” I burst out laughing.

  “Do you know how many marriages have started because of money? And how many marriages started between two people who didn’t even like each other?” Rich people did that shit all the time. Hell, royals had done it for thousands of years. Why did we have to be any different?

  “No, Lo. I can’t do it.” She shook her head and crossed her arms, as if to make it final.

  I sighed.

  “It would solve all of our problems, Care. It would take less than a week and we could have the money in our hands. And you could fulfill your dream and I could pay my rent and fix my car and stress a little less about finding a job. Don’t forget, I need this money too. You’d be helping me get at it, and I’d be helping you in the process. It’s perfect.”

  She frowned.

  “I hadn’t thought about it that way. I mean, you know that I would do anything for you, Lo, but...” she trailed off. “I just don’t know if I can do that.”

  She sipped her cranberry juice slowly, and I gulped down my tea. I was high on the energy of my brilliant idea.

  “You don’t have to decide now,” I said, even though I wanted her to say yes and agree and for us to make plans to go to the courthouse right away.

  “Okay,” she said. “I will think about it. I promise. It’s just a huge surprise and a shock.”

  It wasn’t every day that someone said “hey, let’s get married so you can pay for grad school,” but here I was with a solution to our dilemmas and I wanted nothing more than to share that money with her. There was more than enough for both of us. I knew my parents would support my idea of sharing the money with Cara. They loved her as if she was their own daughter, which was good, because her parents were the worst. I was glad she had finally cut off all contact with them.

  Our food arrived and a silence descended on the table, but it wasn’t uncomfortable. Cara and I had spent so many years together, silence wasn’t
a bad thing. My pancakes were perfect and fluffy as usual, but it didn’t matter. I was itchy and wanted to leave. Whenever I got a good idea like that, I had to see it through immediately or else I couldn’t sit still. I wanted action, now. Cara had never been like that. She was the kind of person who looked at every single angle and made countless lists and took forever to decide. Maybe that was good, since she was in the medical field and people’s lives were in her hands. I couldn’t even imagine. I was much more happy with computer data that wouldn’t die if I made a mistake.

  “Got any good stories for me?” I asked. Cara always had interesting stories from the hospital, and sometimes they were about her coworkers.

  “Two of the EMTs got caught banging in an ambulance they were supposed to be restocking. Of course they just got reprimanded, but I can’t even imagine the looks on their faces when they got caught.” We both laughed.

  “That’s some Grey’s Anatomy shit right there.” She rolled her eyes.

  “I hate that show.”

  “I know you do,” I said. Cara had a problem with almost any medical drama because they got everything wrong, and she spent most of her time yelling at the screen. It was adorable and sometimes I wanted to watch things with her just to see it.

  She told me some more stories, but in the back of my mind, I was only thinking about the money. And about putting a hypothetical ring on Cara’s finger.

  Three

  Of course I couldn’t keep my mouth shut and I told Ansel about my idea when we had pizza on Sunday night. He’d agreed to buy, and threw in a pitcher of cheap beer that I was slowly sipping, along with water.

  “That would make way more sense than you and I getting married. Especially since you both need money.” Cara wasn’t any more attracted to me than Ansel was, and she’d been my best friend since we were kids. There weren’t any kind of romantic feelings involved, so it would still be a marriage for the money.

  “I know. She’s hesitant about it, and I get that, but we both need this, and I know if she was in the same boat, she’d do the same. And I’m sure she’ll try to do some sort of ridiculous repayment plan or something. God, she’s probably working one out right now, with interest.” That was probably exactly what she was doing right now. I could see her with her brows furrowed in concentration.